Kevin May - Other Stuff

We get all manner of bizarre press releases sent to us at the day job, many of them utter nonsense.

But this one, outside of the normal tech remit of Tnooz, relates to London Stansted, the airport just five miles away from home.

The airport’s security folk have been keeping track of some of the more bizarre items that are confiscated during passenger checks.

According to officials, these are the top ten weirdest things collected in the terminal over the past year or so:

1. Crustaceans
2. Love cuffs
3. Human body fat
4. A sweet jar containing live goldfish
5. Machete
6. Snow globes
7. Drills and sanders
8. Sling shot
9. Dirty nappies
10. Air rifles

Okay, so a snow globe is a reasonably anodyne object - it’s often a gift, after all.

But body fat?!? Love cuffs (“Yes, officer, they’re for a, err, fancy dress party”. “Really, sir?”)?!!?

And presumably anyone that tries to get a machete, sling shot or air rifle onto a plane has completely forgotten that airport and airline authorities are kinda nervous about weaponry in the aviation industry these days.

Dirty nappies? No wonder security staff wear gloves these days.

Gotta feel for the goldfish though.

Been pondering this since reading DJ Nick Warren’s Top Dance Music Classics on InTheMix earlier this week.

So, in no particular order, ten faves from the dancefloor…

1. Jam & Spoon - Odyssey to Anyoona (Original vinyl extended mix)

Like Warren, agree that the later, vocal version is a shocker. This was a mainstay of mid-1990s club rooms, championed by the likes of Warren and Paul Oakenfold at Cream in Liverpool and Club UK in London.

2. Leftfield - Release the Pressure

Not sure there has ever been a better opener to a dance album (Leftism) - an album which was also a debut, no less, stuffed full of quality tracks.

Leftfield was one of the bands of-the-moment, managing to fuse dub, techno, low-fi and good ol’ pounding house to an amazing effect. Song of Life almost made this list.

3. Binary Finary - 1998 (Matt Darey Remix)

Many, many versions of this classic from Binary Finary, with the Paul van Dyk mix often scoring higher than this from DJ and producer Matt Darey.

Such is its hands-in-the-air, end-of-the-night brilliance that it ended up on so many mix albums over that period that for a while, for some, it lost its sparkle. But 14 years on, it still does the trick. Made it to my Audio Drivel 1 mix. 

4. Fragma - Toca Me (In Petto Mix)

This was tucked away on a 12-inch B-side for the original bouncy effort. It is still a monumental mix, although to a late-30-something it sounds a touch on the speedy side these days :).

5. Way Out West - Domination (album version)

Nick Warren is not only a well-known DJ but has also spent the best part of 15 years as one half of Way Out West.

This monster of a track was included on the first album in the mid-1990s and has lost none of its brilliance. The John F Kennedy vocal sample is ace.

6. Trentmoller - Moan/Evil Dub (live)

Perhaps more from the low-fi end of the dance spectrum, Trentmoller’s Moan was always a wonderfully mesmeric studio tune, but put it in a live setting with a cameo appearance from fellow track Evil Dub and it takes on a life of its own.

The drummer and hard-scratch DJ are simply fantastic.

7. Sister Bliss - Bad Man (Rollo and Sister Bliss Original Mix)

This little known track was released a short while before Bliss and Rollo came together officially to form Faithless.

It has everything - a hard vocal, break-beats in the middle, cheesy house piano at the end.

8. Faithless - Tarantula

…and then Faithless came along, with tune after tune after tune. While many hold Insomnia, Salva Mea and God Is A DJ in high esteem, Tarantula remains the best from that period whilst, more recently, the fabulous Feelin’ Good stands out and might make it.

Incidentally, many forget that a heavily mixed Tarantula was used by the BBC as the theme tune for its coverage of the World Cup 2002.

9. Space Brothers - Shine

Clearly the most (cheesy) vocal track on this list, but Shine is a classic from the period just before trance went mainstream in the last-1990s.

This 12-inch version is still the best mix around.

10. New Order - Ruined In A Day (K-Klass remix)

New Order’s classic 80’s 12-inch Blue Monday was given a fabulous new look in the mid-1990s, but this beauty from the same period stands out.

Ruined in a Day was a wonderful song in its own right, but K-Klass did something amazing to it, making it one of the best remixes of all time.

So, never a definitive list. Will probably want to remove and add tracks the second after striking the publish button.

But it’s a decent enough collection…